Marriage is hard. You take two people from completely different backgrounds, throw them together night and day for the rest of their lives. Inevitably, flaws rise to the surface, imperfections are exposed, and people get hurt.
Everyone has a bad day now and then. Everyone feels grumpy once in a while. We all do things unthinkingly that hurt the ones we love. We need to forgive and be forgiven. Here are some tips that may help you forgive.
1. Recognize your spouse isn’t perfect — neither are you
While dating, we put our best foot forward and try to hide all our imperfections. After marriage, it is impossible to keep that up. You will discover rather quickly that your husband isn’t perfect. It is important to remember that neither are you. I try to afford my husband the same patience, understanding and forgiveness that I want him to extend to me. Believe me, that’s a lot.
2. Understand where your spouse comes from
Your wife comes from a family full of flaws and quirks. She has certainly inherited a good share of them. She probably doesn’t recognize that her behavior is hurtful to you. For example, I come from a very big family. We interrupt each other a lot during conversations, probably because it’s the only way to have your voice heard in the middle of the cacophony. It is easy for my husband to feel dismissed or unimportant when I interrupt him. However, he forgives me because he understands why I do it.